I was on a favorite website of mine this morning and ran across this quote from a great singer of our times, Adele. A lot of times, both the fairer sex and us men are judged on appearances. Even just yesterday, while my better half and I while walking the streets in Philadelphia, we were on a quest to find a perfect butt on a girl...to no avail. There was no doing doing doing to be had.
Yes, I am guilty of judging those on how they look. This is not the pot calling the kettle black. When it comes down to it, our society today is full of critics. What is the old addage? "Those who can not do, teach." Well, these days, it seems it's become "Those who can not do, criticize."
Here's my thoughts on the matter...we're all imperfect. We all put others down to boost our own egos. We're all guilty of this. Yes, you too. Even just pointing this out is judgmental to a degree. There is constant focus placed on ego and how it has affected mankind. From the bully in your high school who was displacing negative emotion by beating the piss out of you for your lunch money to international struggles over which God to worship, costing millions of lives through the centuries.
This makes me think of another misquoted addage which is a verse in the Bible. "Money is the root of all evil." WRONG! Money is necessary in the society in which we live. If we threw money away and said "Yay! Evil will be gone soon!", mass pandemonium would break out. Now...let's see what the actual verse says. "The love of money is the root of all evil." - 1TIM 6:10 (In every translation and language).
Ego, when misdirected or unleashed, has historically been responsible for many horrible things. But it has also been used for good. Just like anything else in our lives, balance and proper placement of our ego is what is needed. Without ego, we would be quite boring. Individuality would become null. Innovation would not exist. What reason would we have to be proud, therefore boosting our self-esteem in a positive way, without ego? Yet, he who says he is humble, truly is not.
Won't finding happiness and inner peace show your true beauty instead of relying on public opinion and media expectations? Why not focus on just what makes you happy? Why not feel the positive effects of what your ego is supposed to do for you? When you're on your deathbed, will what other people thought throughout the years matter? Why not try to find a balance in your life? The decision to do these things may be the easy part. The little three letter word that baffles all of us is "HOW".
And right now, even thinking "Who does this Thunderstick guy think he is telling me about ego?" is your ego. But, you're right. Who am I to be waxing philosophical about things that are yet to be understood after generations of thought on the matter. So, here are some influential figures' thoughts on the topic. I don't agree with all of these, but who am I to judge.
“Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.” - Frederich Neitzsche
“Give up all bad qualities in you, banish the ego and develop the spirit of surrender. You will then experience Bliss.” - Sri Sathya Sai Baba (Indian Spiritual Leader)
“If you want to reach a state of bliss, then go beyond your ego and the internal dialogue. Make a decision to relinquish the need to control, the need to be approved, and the need to judge. Those are the three things the ego is doing all the time. It's very important to be aware of them every time they come up.” - Deepak Chopra
"I got a big ego, such a huge ego. But he love my big ego, It's too much. I walk like this 'cause I can back it up." - Beyonce Knowles (song lyrics - Ego)
“Where ID was, there shall ego be.” - Sigmund Freud
“Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?” - Bill Maher
"The word enlightenment conjures up the idea of some superhuman accomplishment, and the ego likes to keep it that way, but it is simply your natural state of felt oneness with Being." - Eckhart Tolle
Thunderstick out.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Happy 9-11? WTF?
This morning on Facebook, I wrote "Happy 9-11!". I'm sure this caused many different reactions to those who saw it. A lot of us are scared to express our emotions on other's opinions of this day of remembrance. I was going to wait to write this, but the two responses I've gotten so far are interesting.
1. I was asked "Happy?" by someone that know me well and has become a good friend.
2. I was called a "f*cking idiot" by someone whom I met once and had only conversed with drunkenly.
We all have different memories and varied stories, some more heart wrenching than others about that fateful day just a decade ago. For some it's seems a lifetime ago, others still too fresh to recognize as the past. It took me a very long time to see images of what happened in different media outlets, because I was too busy in my dreams watching it replay over and over. And I'm one of the lucky ones.
Without getting into the hairy details, I'm lucky to be alive. Had I been a responsible adult in my mid-20s, I'd have never made it to my late 20's. The afternoon before the successful attack on the WTC in NYC, I was in a meeting at "Windows of the World". For those not familiar, it was a restaurant in the North Tower on the 107th floor of WTC. Specifically, I was at "The Greatest Bar on Earth" shamelessly promoting a new European energy drink as a mixer that would eventually take America by storm, Red Bull.
My meeting was running over and we scheduled to pick up where we left off at 9:00 am the next morning, Tuesday, September 11, 2001. After an art gallery opening the evening before which my friends and I turned into a near all-nighter, I drove home, showered and went to work. I got into my work van and started driving over the Brooklyn Bridge worried about stinking of the whiskey from the night before. Upon reaching Lower Manhattan, I felt the ground shake and decided to turn back to Brooklyn. Speeding into the Red Hook docks, I saw smoke billowing from the first tower to be attacked. The other drivers were standing at the edge of the dock speechless. I jumped out of my van and got the news that it was an airplane and most of them thought it was an accident. It felt like black sludge was running through my veins and I started shaking. I immediately called my mother who was in Bucks County, PA fast asleep. I spent the morning on the phone with her praying not to lose the connection knowing I wouldn't get it back.
Fear and abandon. There's no words to describe the feeling I had when I noticed a plane looping around the Statue of Liberty, turning a 90 degree angle and implanting itself into the side of the other tower. During those moments, the only word that would come out of my body and I repeated incessantly was "NO!". No breath could enter my body, no tear could leave. Although I should have been relieved to be alive and had just escaped death, all I felt was overwhelming fear and indescribable loss. Not a physical loss, but one that shook my heart to the core like never before.
I remember seeing the beautiful blue cloudless sky being eaten by smoke and soot, a memory that I will carry with me to the grave. This was soon followed by ash, paper, bits of clothes with flesh and blood attached to them raining from the sky. After wandering through Brooklyn looking for something, but not knowing what, I returned to my car. And on what started as a beautiful morning, I used my ice scraper to clean bits of people, ash and paper off my car. The smell was of death.
Looking back, It took me many years of self-destructive behavior, testing, hurting and ruining personal relationships, sabotaging everything that could become of permanence in my life, testing my will and betraying my conscience to push through the mental, emotional and spiritual walls I had built that day. Don't get me wrong, there are many other reasons that I constantly rebelled, yet that day put a seal on any glimmer of reasonable thinking I thought I had.
Fast forward ten years, 4 DUIs, jail time, therapists that said I was beyond help, dismissal of reason, destroying of opportunities, rehab, an awakening and much painful work to find myself again, I can honestly say this is the first 9/11 I woke up a happy man.
For many years on the anniversary of this day, I would stay in bed, put massive amounts of alcohol and other substances in my body and do hurtful things to myself and those who care for me. Today, I'm spending the day cleaning my new house with my sponsor and the girl I will marry one day. So, yes, to me I say "Happy 9-11!" and I look forward to waking up in the morning now instead of the daily - wake, vomit, sludge through work, drink myself stupid and repeat - routine of my past 10 years.
There are many who haven't moved forward or have been forced to relive the horrors of that day regularly, if not constantly. I can only pray and hope that you are able to find your way as I have been blessed to get on with my life's journey. If I could envelop those that were suffering and take it away from them, I would have done so long ago, yet I am only one man. So, if you read something, meet someone who has been through these events personally, or you don't agree with someone's opinion regarding this day and what they have to say, don't be quick to judge or insult. You more than likely have had a different experience than them. Give them a moment of your time to express where they're coming from and you may learn something or become enlightened to a different perspective.
Thunderstick out.
1. I was asked "Happy?" by someone that know me well and has become a good friend.
2. I was called a "f*cking idiot" by someone whom I met once and had only conversed with drunkenly.
We all have different memories and varied stories, some more heart wrenching than others about that fateful day just a decade ago. For some it's seems a lifetime ago, others still too fresh to recognize as the past. It took me a very long time to see images of what happened in different media outlets, because I was too busy in my dreams watching it replay over and over. And I'm one of the lucky ones.
Without getting into the hairy details, I'm lucky to be alive. Had I been a responsible adult in my mid-20s, I'd have never made it to my late 20's. The afternoon before the successful attack on the WTC in NYC, I was in a meeting at "Windows of the World". For those not familiar, it was a restaurant in the North Tower on the 107th floor of WTC. Specifically, I was at "The Greatest Bar on Earth" shamelessly promoting a new European energy drink as a mixer that would eventually take America by storm, Red Bull.
My meeting was running over and we scheduled to pick up where we left off at 9:00 am the next morning, Tuesday, September 11, 2001. After an art gallery opening the evening before which my friends and I turned into a near all-nighter, I drove home, showered and went to work. I got into my work van and started driving over the Brooklyn Bridge worried about stinking of the whiskey from the night before. Upon reaching Lower Manhattan, I felt the ground shake and decided to turn back to Brooklyn. Speeding into the Red Hook docks, I saw smoke billowing from the first tower to be attacked. The other drivers were standing at the edge of the dock speechless. I jumped out of my van and got the news that it was an airplane and most of them thought it was an accident. It felt like black sludge was running through my veins and I started shaking. I immediately called my mother who was in Bucks County, PA fast asleep. I spent the morning on the phone with her praying not to lose the connection knowing I wouldn't get it back.
Fear and abandon. There's no words to describe the feeling I had when I noticed a plane looping around the Statue of Liberty, turning a 90 degree angle and implanting itself into the side of the other tower. During those moments, the only word that would come out of my body and I repeated incessantly was "NO!". No breath could enter my body, no tear could leave. Although I should have been relieved to be alive and had just escaped death, all I felt was overwhelming fear and indescribable loss. Not a physical loss, but one that shook my heart to the core like never before.
I remember seeing the beautiful blue cloudless sky being eaten by smoke and soot, a memory that I will carry with me to the grave. This was soon followed by ash, paper, bits of clothes with flesh and blood attached to them raining from the sky. After wandering through Brooklyn looking for something, but not knowing what, I returned to my car. And on what started as a beautiful morning, I used my ice scraper to clean bits of people, ash and paper off my car. The smell was of death.
Looking back, It took me many years of self-destructive behavior, testing, hurting and ruining personal relationships, sabotaging everything that could become of permanence in my life, testing my will and betraying my conscience to push through the mental, emotional and spiritual walls I had built that day. Don't get me wrong, there are many other reasons that I constantly rebelled, yet that day put a seal on any glimmer of reasonable thinking I thought I had.
Fast forward ten years, 4 DUIs, jail time, therapists that said I was beyond help, dismissal of reason, destroying of opportunities, rehab, an awakening and much painful work to find myself again, I can honestly say this is the first 9/11 I woke up a happy man.
For many years on the anniversary of this day, I would stay in bed, put massive amounts of alcohol and other substances in my body and do hurtful things to myself and those who care for me. Today, I'm spending the day cleaning my new house with my sponsor and the girl I will marry one day. So, yes, to me I say "Happy 9-11!" and I look forward to waking up in the morning now instead of the daily - wake, vomit, sludge through work, drink myself stupid and repeat - routine of my past 10 years.
There are many who haven't moved forward or have been forced to relive the horrors of that day regularly, if not constantly. I can only pray and hope that you are able to find your way as I have been blessed to get on with my life's journey. If I could envelop those that were suffering and take it away from them, I would have done so long ago, yet I am only one man. So, if you read something, meet someone who has been through these events personally, or you don't agree with someone's opinion regarding this day and what they have to say, don't be quick to judge or insult. You more than likely have had a different experience than them. Give them a moment of your time to express where they're coming from and you may learn something or become enlightened to a different perspective.
Thunderstick out.
Friday, September 9, 2011
Hello my potential minions. You have just ventured into dangerous territory. Continue further and you will not be able to wash some of these images and ideas from your mind...EVER. The following will not be tolerated:
If you have to question yourself regarding any of the aforementioned ailments, I suggest you return to your previous activity, pray to your God for forgiveness and move along as if nothing has occurred. Good riddance.
Now, you with the strength and conviction to journey into my mind, good luck. You will need and know how to use the following tools:
If you're still here, put on your helmet and insert your bite plate. This short bus is going down a bumpy road to nowheretown.
Without further adieu, today I have a bit of a rant. Upon nearing my exit of Philadelphia's wondrous transit system, I was catching up on some reading while overhearing a young Pre-Med student describe his day to his girlfriend in doctor corporate speak. I was about to stop eavesdropping when this was relayed to his uninterested better half, "I started learning today about under-promising and over-delivering. I think I met the Professor's expectations."
My head nearly exploded. There are innumerable items wrong with this statement. Let me list a few....
Where on this green earth did doing your prescribed job correctly go? With the time you're spending trying to manipulate the person who you're feeding chemicals to treat an ailment, you could be concentrating on hmmm...giving them healthcare. Wait...what? Complete the task you're payed an insanely inflated salary to perform? Possibly, Insurance rates could go down, patients could be healthier. Ailments are treated instead of side effects of the other scripts they're taking. People could live longer, society could flourish. But, nah...gotta cover my ass and make sure I look good.
I think that the "Under-Promise and Over-Deliver" stigma should stick to certain industries like fast food, porn and to a certain degree business.
On that note, I’m going to finish my plate of beef nachos and my roast beef sandwich and throw some DNA into a sock...Good health to you!
Turn off your TV and pick up a book. Lonely ladies, get your fill of Fabio like men here
.
And if you want to get real live human sex, ladies...walk outside of your house. Men, take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth and bring a gawd dang rubber with you!
Thunderstick out.
- Weak Heart
- Weak Mind
- Weak Spirit
- Weak Tongue
If you have to question yourself regarding any of the aforementioned ailments, I suggest you return to your previous activity, pray to your God for forgiveness and move along as if nothing has occurred. Good riddance.
Now, you with the strength and conviction to journey into my mind, good luck. You will need and know how to use the following tools:
- The capacity to whore your ideas.
- The strength to stand for your beliefs and convictions.
- The ability to prove your rant, point and/or argument.
- The cunning to understand blackened sarcasm.
If you're still here, put on your helmet and insert your bite plate. This short bus is going down a bumpy road to nowheretown.
Without further adieu, today I have a bit of a rant. Upon nearing my exit of Philadelphia's wondrous transit system, I was catching up on some reading while overhearing a young Pre-Med student describe his day to his girlfriend in doctor corporate speak. I was about to stop eavesdropping when this was relayed to his uninterested better half, "I started learning today about under-promising and over-delivering. I think I met the Professor's expectations."
My head nearly exploded. There are innumerable items wrong with this statement. Let me list a few....
Where on this green earth did doing your prescribed job correctly go? With the time you're spending trying to manipulate the person who you're feeding chemicals to treat an ailment, you could be concentrating on hmmm...giving them healthcare. Wait...what? Complete the task you're payed an insanely inflated salary to perform? Possibly, Insurance rates could go down, patients could be healthier. Ailments are treated instead of side effects of the other scripts they're taking. People could live longer, society could flourish. But, nah...gotta cover my ass and make sure I look good.
I think that the "Under-Promise and Over-Deliver" stigma should stick to certain industries like fast food, porn and to a certain degree business.
On that note, I’m going to finish my plate of beef nachos and my roast beef sandwich and throw some DNA into a sock...Good health to you!
Turn off your TV and pick up a book. Lonely ladies, get your fill of Fabio like men here
.
And if you want to get real live human sex, ladies...walk outside of your house. Men, take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth and bring a gawd dang rubber with you!
Thunderstick out.
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